Finding vs. Looking

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Expectations, outcome, and disappointmentWhat is the difference in finding and looking?  The two words sound so much the same.  When we look, we are looking so that we can find something.   We look for our car keys.  We find our car keys.  Yeah, that sounds pretty close.  The question is, can we find our car keys without looking?

How many times have your torn through your house looking for your keys?  You look everywhere that you have been.  You look in the normal spots.  You look in the abnormal spots.  They are gone.  You close your eyes and take a breath.  You find them.  They were here all along.  You did not need to look for them for them to be here.

When we actively look for something we set up expectations in our mind for what we will find or where we will find it.  Those expectations limit and can set us up for disappointment if they are not fully met. Let go of expectations of finding and just find.

We suffer because we want things to last forever or, even worse, we EXPECT things to last forever. But, impermanence isn’t a bad thing in itself. That is just a value that we apply to it. Without impermanence, life is not possible. How can we transform our suffering if things are not impermanent? How can the situation in the world improve? We need impermanence for hope.

- Daniel Boepyol Scharpenburg  - unleashyourbuddhanature

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7 thoughts on “Finding vs. Looking

    Blue88journal said:
    February 22, 2013 at 6:39 am

    Accepting impermanence is a key step in overcoming addiciton as well. I’ve suffered first-hand, until learnign from nature…and accepting things for how and when they are. ;)
    -Luke

      bg responded:
      February 24, 2013 at 7:43 pm

      Thank you for sharing. Very good point about learning about impermanence from nature. Today I took my kids to the park and they had a nature art program where we made sculptures from natural materials. They may be torn down by man or nature, but they most certainly will not last. However, for a brief moment, they stand and reflect what we saw in them before nature takes our feeble attempt at making something permanent and turns it back into the constant change and flow. As Frost said “Nothing gold can stay”.

      I am glad that you overcame your addiction and that you are here writing for us today. Thank you.

      Be well,
      Brian

        Blue88journal said:
        February 24, 2013 at 8:05 pm

        Thanks for the great reply! Nature has it’s way of creating and destroying, without preference or prejudice. We just have to go along with the ride. -Luke

    database of grants said:
    March 12, 2013 at 5:18 am

    Its like you read my thoughts! You seem to understand so much about this, like you wrote the e-book in it or something. I think that you simply can do with some p.c. to force the message house a little bit, however other than that, this is magnificent blog. A great read. I’ll definitely be back.

      bg responded:
      March 12, 2013 at 8:30 pm

      Thanks!

    danielschar said:
    July 19, 2013 at 3:16 pm

    Hello!
    I googled myself and found a quote from me on your blog!
    How are you doing? How did you find me?

      bg responded:
      July 19, 2013 at 8:32 pm

      Hi Daniel

      Stop googling yourself. :) I originally found you through your Tumblr blog a few months ago. Your posts are very inspirational and I am enjoying your longer posts on your new site. I think that I have also referenced your eight-fold path mnemonic of “Until Thoughts Stop Acting Like Excited Monkeys, Confusion”.

      Namaste,
      Brian

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