I am a seeker, but at the same time, I realize that there is nothing to seek because it is already here. I am a finder. I am a realizer. When I seek, there is nothing, but when I am still there is everything. I flop between paths and I am slowly landing on one now. I am realizing that action is required and not just sitting. Sitting is good for peace and calibration, but it is not the same as action. At some point I feel that non-action is all that is required, but for now I feel that I must make the change. And the change is in the present. Can action and non-action be the same?
Is there really anything that I am doing or am I just thinking it? Is there really anything to do, or is it all just a thought? If it is just a thought, then what? Does that change anything? Does physical world vs. thought world make a difference? If something is in its physical form, then aren’t I still thinking about it in thought form. Is it ever physical? Is anything physical more than thought?
Even to touch something is to feel it and label it. It is a thought. If I feel something hard and I think of something hard, is there a difference between a feeling of hard which is labeled and thus a thought, and just the simple thought of something hard? How many thoughts are there in feeling something? The sensations and spacial reasoning. I know what parts of my body are in contact with an object. So it is more than just a thought of something being a certain way. It is the thought of that something in relation to myself. The physical world is defined as being in relation to myself. There is always that reference point. I look around the room and everything I see is described and labeled to me based on my past experiences. Everything I see, in a way reminds me of everything I am. I am it and it is me. And yet, that is not true.It seems absurd.
All of that is a thought. I am the thought. I am not the thought. Let go or be dragged.