A couple of my friends and I went to practice our kayak lessons on the lake today. I took the last lesson solo and I could not get the roll portion down. Even my strokes were like the first day. I have been taking so long between classes (2-3 weeks +) that the lessons are not sticking and I am having to relearn things that I should already know. The main part of this is that I do not own my own kayak and the classes range from $50-80 a lesson. It is worth the money, but I hate to spend money when I can practice the basics on my own. I do wonder if an immersion process would have been better to force us quickly through the steps without much thinking.
Well, we all have kayaks now. So there is no excuse. I would like to stick with it for the next few weeks. If I am serious about it then I need to shell out more for a wet suit. That just seems to be the tie in this world that is limiting. We can essentially do what we want, but it does cost money. To get money I need to have an education and an attitude for success. I save and budget to show the respect for the process. I have to put in work to get something that I want. Is that a bad thing? Sure I would like to win the lottery, but is working to get what I want so bad? Larger goals may take longer, but if I have vision for what you want, maybe I can achieve it sooner. To do this, I think that I have to quit imaging the way.
I want to take a vacation to Hawaii with my family. If I imagine that I am going to work and save up all my money, I am effectively setting an expectation that it will happen, but it will take months or years. If I imagine that I am going to win the lottery, then that feels somewhat greedy. I imagine that I inherit money, but I don’t want anyone to die for me to be able to realize a dream. I would like to drop all expectations of how it will happen and allow it to happen. I need to drop all expectations of what it will be, what I think it should be and imagine it happening. It is a practice to let go of the path and trust the way.
My biggest issue with kayaking is ironically the water. I am getting over my fear of being underwater and learning more patience at the same time. Funny enough, I think part of this is the wording of thoughts in my head. I am trying to go from thinking or saying “rolling is difficult for me because I have a fear of drowning”, to “I am getting over a fear of drowning that I had in the past”. The fear is not happening now, it happened. I still think that is negative because that implies that the past is a certain way and I was a certain way in the past. But all of that is just a fabrication of my mind churning though bits and pieces of memories that it needs to support my current thought pattern. In other words, I cannot say how I was in the past because the past is not happening now other than through a chain of thought that branches off from the actual current moment. So I did not have a fear of drowning in the past. The fear certainly does not exist in the future, that is obviously a thought projection. So does it really exist at all other than through thought trails going forward and backward (and every which way) from the current moment?
- Don’t Make Decisions Based On Fear (jsb10711.wordpress.com)
- Woot! Woot! Kayak sale at Suntrail (biglakelife.wordpress.com)
- Sea Kayaking- Adventurous as well as Relaxing (woodenboatusa.wordpress.com)
- Kayaking on Woodlands Waterway (studentcenternews.com)
- Looking for a Kayak (kayakdov.wordpress.com)
- Navy veteran becomes first blind kayaker to paddle length of Grand Canyon (grindtv.com)
- Kayaking! (nadinesphotography.wordpress.com)