Why is it that we can remember some things some of the time, but not all things all of the time? Why is memory selective to the situation and the frame of mind? Why does doing certain things trigger certain memories? Why are those memories chosen over others?
Sometimes the memories bring pleasure, and we cherish those over the ones that bring us pain. Still, we remember the ones that bring us pain.
One memory… one moment… triggering the next one.
What was the first one? And how could there ever be a first one?
An empty state
A state of emptiness
I almost didn’t put the above quote in because when I searched for it, the first hit was fakebuddhaquotes.com. It was like I thought the quote and the inspiration/feeling /whatever that it sparked was less because Buddha didn’t say it. Whatever that really means. To deny that Buddha said it, would be denying the Buddha-nature of whoever said it. Right? So I posted it.
I started this post because I was thinking back to this week at work, and thinking on some things I might have said or done differently if I had remembered something specific at that time.
So, the information is there, but there are time and/or cost constraints imposed by the situation that prevent the it form being retrieved. I know that I am just rewording the above, but that sometimes helps me to wrap my brain around it.
In my situation, there was a time constraint in that I was being asked to show something. Did I impose the constraint upon myself? I was asked to describe a process and if I had diagrams. My mind reeled to a specific type of diagram to show, and I locked in on that. I didn’t think that I had anything appropriate to show the audience. However, there was another type of diagram showing something different that might have been of great value to the audience and somewhat have made me look good to my peers and upper management. I only really thought about that now in thinking back on this week.
Honestly, I don’t know what the outcome would have been if I had of thought of it in that moment and executed. My mind does try to play that out and make it seem that it is better than what happened.
I could have slowed down more in the moment to think about what was being asked. I am still assuming that I could have found, and then acted upon that information differently than what I did.
And I can’t help but think. Did I do what I thought I did or did I do the other thing?
Because what is memory?
It is something that happened in the past.
It is not happening now.
So I can’t say for sure that my memory is right OR wrong.
It is a state of uncertainty. Yet, we make it certain in our minds. Is that for sanity? If we were not certain about our memories, would that really change anything now? Where I am sitting now has to from a set of events. But there are key points in those events.
This moment. This physical reality could be replicated by any number of similar events. Different events could have made that up in different realities.
There is a story behind how these objects got in this room. Any number of stories could be told on how the objects got into this room. For me, if I start looking at the objects, I come to a story on how each one got into the room from when I first remember seeing the object. Of course there are gaps, and not a full story. For the objects I don’t remember putting into the room, I make assumptions that someone else put the objects into the room. I settle on something that makes sense to me.
That must be the universe collapsed down to a definite state.
But if all possibilities are limitless…. all possible moments spawn after this moment. It would also be assumed that all possible moments must spawn before this moment.
If that is true, then the physical world spawns when the eyes are opened. Or before the eyes are open with thoughts on what will be seen.
The present moment, not impacted by past or present, is limitless and must be at a point before the physical world and thought are formed.
Physical world is formed by thought. There are other beings that are not formed by our thoughts. Their physical form is formed by our thoughts, but not the being itself. Sentience may arise at any level.
Would a sentient being be aware if it were comprised of other sentient beings or systems. And at some level, isn’t it all alive? Strings and quarks and things hopping into and out of existence?