I think that laughing helps me kill my self. It helps me forget everything else and I feel complete in the world without anything lacking. I am thrust into the moment where that is all there is. I feel a rush to my head brought on by the extra flow of blood. It feels like parts of my brain come alive that have been sleeping. Like when blood rushes into a limb that has gone numb.
You are influenced by the past, but in reality there is no past. The past is something that you made up that just simply jives with whatever you can accept as your reality. It contains your fears that you will relive until you overcome them. But it also contains your hopes and your joys. The suffering that you may have encountered has taught you a lesson. All of this combines to make you who you are today. Every choice made you the person reading these words. You are alive. That is pretty fucking amazing. How can any of that be wrong?